Music

Last Saturday I had an unforgettable experience. The kind you want to store in your memory and relive in your mind again and again.

I was given two tickets to the NY Philharmonic as a Christmas gift from CPC this year for being the church pianist. Mother and I went to hear Brahms' second serenade and second piano concerto with Emmanuel Ax at the piano and Lauren Maazel conducting. It was awesome, wondrous, incredible! I'd heard the concerto on CD a number of times - I actually got it from CPC last year - but to hear it live, to watch it being performed, was another thing entirely. All of us in the audience were spellbound - watching, listening.

I'm struggling to find words fit to describe this experience - I keep writing sentences and then deleting them. Suffice to say it was unforgettable and that my piano teacher, who was also there, said he had never heard Brahms performed better before.

I think one of the wonderful things about music is that most anyone can enjoy it. You don't have to be very knowledgeable of music to appreciate it. I suppose there are levels of appreciation. My teacher sitting beside me definitely had a better understanding of the music than I did, giving him a greater appreciation for how well it was performed, among other things. But I'm not convinced that a great appreciation means greater enjoyment. But perhaps it does. I just have a hard time believing I could enjoy it more than I did!

That isn't to say that I don't want to appreciate music more. I do. I want to learn more. It fascinates me. Sometimes I find myself frustrated by how little I know. Especially when I read the inside the CD cover. Who writes that stuff?! Today in music appreciation at school I was quite distressed that I didn't have enough knowledge to defend my position or to counter my teacher's insistent, self-confident arguments. In retrospect, I don't think any arguments would convince him, but I stick to my "preposterous, ignorant" claim that Bach's music should be played in the traditional Baroque style, not as Romantic music, and that Glenn Gould doesn't play like a robot.

The College Question Again

I've been meaning to post for a while on the college question. I'm not exactly sure what has been delaying me. It's definitely something "happening in my life" and something "I've been thinking about".

I visited Covenant College in January to compete for the Maclellan scholarship. Even though I have been very enthuastic about Wheaton, I think I went there with an open mind, willing to like it and imagine myself there. I got a feel for the college, administration, student body; visited lots of classes; ran unexpectedly into an old friend from elementary school that I hadn't seen or spoken to in years; and hung out with Kate and her friends that weekend. So it was a good visit, but I found that I really didn't like Covenant as much as Wheaton. It felt too small and rather isolated, alone on the top of Lookout Mountain. Most students, though kind and helpful, didn't seem as motivated or enthusiastic. But I'm certainly don't feel completely negative about Covenant. There are some things about Covenant that I prefer over Wheaton. I think the visit has helped keep me from idealizing Wheaton.

I was quite relieved to learn that I did not get Covenant's Maclellan scholarship. That would have made for a difficult decision. A few days after I got that news, I mailed a deposit to Wheaton College!

I had kind of expected to feel a lot of relief after making the final decision. But I don't really, though I'm not entirely sure why not. Perhaps it's the uncertainty of the future. Perhaps it's too much concern about what other people think of my decision. Some people don't approve of Christian colleges. Some people don't approve of Wheaton College. Some people don't approve of spending that much money on college. Most of my classmates already have full rides. I probably could too if I wanted to go to Rutgers. Perhaps I am wrong.

And then there is the looming question of what to study at Wheaton. I'm seriously considering music education. I'm practicing the piano a lot and preparing for an audition. I love music. But I love English too. It would be hard to give up a liberal arts education and the great English department at Wheaton.

So those are some of my current thoughts. Further bulletins as events warrant.

In Alaska

Isn't this an amazing picture of us in Alaska last winter? It's hard to believe it was almost a year ago. The picture doesn't do justice to the the beauty of the mountains and water. The floating ice on the water was swirling in the circles, constantly moving. You could watch it for hours except it was so cold and windy.

Observations

It's been very cold recently but we've had precious little snow. Not so much as a delayed opening yet this year. Tragic. However we have had some light dustings of snow. On a couple occasions it was enough to get my feet very cold as I cleared the snow of Clyde before driving to school. On both of those days there was far much more school in West Orange than in Montville. That reminded me of elementary school days. We used to come to school and brag about how many inches of snow there was at our house. I think our social status in the class was determined by the meteorological conditions where we lived. I never faired to well because my classmates all lived a little farther north. Either that or they exaggerated even more than I did.

Sadly for me this year that social status is no longer determined by the amount of snow you have. But remembering that got me wondering, is there a similar, bizarre method of establishing social position in highschool? (And also, why do we care? But I guess that's a different question entirely.) Here's my theory: In high school, or at least at Trinity, social status is determined by how little sleep you get, or perhaps more explicitly, how little sleep you say you get. I think this is even more tragic than our not having gotten much snow yet this year. But I really think there is some truth in it. I don't think there was a day this past week that I managed to unpack my backpack in the morning without hearing someone talk about how late they were up and how tired they were. Busy as we all are I think there is no excuse for getting only three or four hours of sleep each night. And absolutely no excuse for complaining about it the next day. Perhaps if I were more cool I'd understand it. Perhaps I should defend this theory a little stronger - there definitely is more that could be said - but now is not the time. I'm going to bed.

Excuses

I'm sorry that I haven't been a better blogger. I meant to post more often. It seems like if I have time, I don't have anything to write about. If I have something to write about, then I don't have the time. And it's hard to write about old ideas. They lose their interest and urgency if I don't write soon enough. They become stale.

My other excuse is that I had the brilliant idea of taking a picture of Clyde to put above the post on him. But I'd have to take the picture at school during a free period, and it's so cold, so very cold oldside, and a long walk across the parking lot to the car and back. So I put it off until I decided not to do it at all. So now I'll write.